sometimes i pretend i’m funny, but then i realize that i’m definitely not funny and i should just shut up.

shut up.

bite me.

no gross.

stop it.

stupid head.

(Reblogged from inoticeyoureanerdfighter)




Kiss someone with your tongue, and it is sensual and perhaps even sexy.

Shove your tongue down their throat and devour their mortal soul, and suddenly you’re "the devil" and way too forward.

Why do I get the feeling that has happened more than once to you?

I.. I run a news show, not an.. ask Cecil questions about the depths of his personal life show.

(Reblogged from nightvales-voice)
I know people normally order the cookies first, and then get them delivered weeks later, but sometimes a mother goes out of town, and the stepfather isn’t on top of his stepdaughter’s extracurricular activities, and then the child doesn’t know how to sell cookies on her own, so the kindly uncle, with a busy radio job, has to step in and buy up a bunch of boxes, so she can go camping with her friends while you continue to disappoint everyone with your inattention to detail, and sports gambling, and idiotic taste in shoes, Steve Carlsberg! Yes, Steve, this is how things sometimes happen.

Welcome to Night Vale

Episode 44 - Cookies

(via nightvalequotes)
(Reblogged from nightvalequotes)


people who dont flush the toilet must be eliminated

If it’s yellow, let it mellow.
If it’s brown, flush it down.

(Reblogged from dad-official)



Based on the tags from this post(ノ*゜▽゜*)

Reblogging this one again because of the events of tonight~

(Reblogged from callalillyg)


Embarrassing Fantasies by ErinPtah

[Transcript at the source.]

I can’t help but think of Carlos as about 80% sciencesexual. It’s not that he doesn’t enjoy sex when it comes up; he just has to be reminded that it exists sometimes, and is an option alongside “do science” and “cuddle while talking about science.”

Cecil, meanwhile, is 100% weirdsexual. Carlos is alternately terrified, really into it, and wondering if he should be terrified about being really into it.


Comic | Fic journal | Art gallery | Blog

(Reblogged from sayidiscoolerthanyou)

WTNV in a nutshell

  • The City Council: dammit cecil
  • Sheriff's secret police: dammit cecil
  • Steve Carlsberg: dammit cecil
  • Basically everyone: dammit cecil
  • Cecil Palmer: dammit cecil
(Reblogged from cecileofnightvale)

Maureen, one of our newer residents who had recently disappeared (because she was also an intern at NVCR) is somehow tweeting… maybe she never actually blinked out of existence. Maybe Cecil is lying. Always lying. Liar.

Anonymous asked: what if Steve Carlsburg brought you to sexual climax


I think you’re taking it a little too far

I agree. That’s just, you know, not a thing I would ever do.

(Reblogged from nightvales-voice)